Do you like who you are?

I know some of you are saying absolutely!  But then there are those who don’t like themselves very much and feel as though they have been short-changed in life.   In fact some people believe that they have been let down in life and they blame that on God and their parents—even some say that it is society’s fault for the problems that they experience.  I know when I was a young Mom and life was difficult, I blamed God for my pain and stress because I felt deserted by God.  I decided that I didn’t need to speak to Him/Her any longer; He wasn’t listening to me anyway.  It was as though I was the forgotten one and life seemed bleak.  But as time went on and I personally became more resilient, my capacity to withstand stress and challenges became less of a burden.  I began to see my life in a broader and clearer way as I continued to become stronger and more disciplined.  As I became better equipped to withstand adversity and adapt to certain conditions that I was facing, I was more decisive, more prepared and more confident with my abilities.  That is when I began to rebuild my life as my foundation became fortified.  I was able to actually see how my capacity to withstand challenges was re-enforced by my positive actions and that process became the template for me to continue the process as my success rate improved. 

Resilience is the increased power or capacity within a person’s psyche that enables that person to withstand difficult situations or experiences.  I began to see why my life was sour and because I was willing to change and grow, my vision was sharper, my strengths became more defined and my life began to improve.   I also started to realize that it was not God who was holding me down but merely my own self-perception of who I was and how I was supposed to let my life play out. 

In other words, I changed.  My self-confidence improved and I faced life in a new and improved way.  I was also able to step back and look at the bigger picture so that my problem solving skills improved.  I was no longer afraid to seek guidance and support and I opened myself to numerous resources that helped improving my sense of knowledge and sound information. 

I no longer felt like a victim but rather as a successful person who had something special to offer to others and because of my improved character traits, I was better prepared to live a healthier lifestyle both, emotional and mentally.  My challenges did not necessarily go away; I was, however, better prepared to cope with them.  I saw adverse conditions with an open mind and was able to handle them.  It was me who changed; my coping skills improved, my sense of worth improved and my ability to stand up to difficulty improved.

If there is something that you do not like about your life, maybe this is the time for you to take a step back and re-examine your situation.  Don’t become exacerbated but rather become resilient physically and in my mindset.  Look at the bigger picture and seek out alternatives. 

Resilient people are willing to look at life with big bold eyes.  They are willing to listen with an open heart and mind and most importantly they accept themselves with a balanced and realistic mindset that puts into focus the pros and cons so they can make the best choice for their highest and best good and in the highest and best way. 

Learning to improve your lifestyle takes work.  Be patient with yourself and be flexible.  Remember ‘Rome wasn’t built in a day.’ 

It is said an eastern monarch once charged his wise men to invent a sentence, to be ever in view, and which should be true and appropriate in all times and situations.  They presented him with the words, ‘And this, too, shall pass away.’  How much it expresses! How chastening in the hour of pride! How consoling in the depths of affliction!    – Abraham Lincoln.

Joan Marie Ambrose

Author, Creative Writer, Motivational Speaker