What could have been

With the holidays right around the corner, many of you will become more nostalgic. You will start reflecting on your younger days, your childhood memories and about the people whom you

have loved and have lost. It is also a time when you may begin wondering about the road that still lies ahead of you. I bet one of you right now is thinking about something or someone from your past or something or someone you would like to share in your future. Maybe you are feeling regret about all the "what could have been" moments. Or perhaps your thoughts are filled with all the fears you have moving forward on some ideas or plans. The holidays do that to us. Possibly the reason we begin to become more circumspectful over time is because of the lessons we have had and the learnings we have gained from those lessons.  When the holidays are upon us, our senses our heightened - as are our feelings associated with these senses.

You are not alone. As you mature, you develop your natural ability to use your intuition to guide you. During certain seasons -- especially when your environment is emotionally charged with powerful energy, you are naturally compelled to think more deeply. You evaluate things more critically but at the same time, you have more appreciation for the people around you and the life you are living. Sometimes, it is a delicate balancing act trying to weigh the deep and mixed emotions you are experiencing all at once.

There is a simple way to clear away the "what could have been" moments when you begin to understand that unconditional love holds the key. There is an anonymous quote that says, "It takes only one second to say I love you, but a lifetime to show it." As you go through your journey in life, it is important to embrace a message of love. There will always be things from our past that cannot be undone, but the good news is that today going forward, you hold within you the power to be a messenger of compassion and unconditional love. By consciously deciding to live in the present moment, to love every opportunity, to show compassion when and where you can, to know that each second holds a blessing, you stop having the "what could have been" moments in your life. By establishing an unconditional love for yourself and to those around you, life gets easier with each passing day.

Yes, you will still have some occasions when you experience sadness thinking about those who have crossed over before you. But life does go on and so will you. The hard truth is that you can do all the "right" things in life. You can make all the "right" decisions, and sometimes, even with your best foot forward, things happen. If you dwell on "what could have been", you begin second-guessing yourself and it starts crumbling your level of self-confidence and your ability to think with common sense. You are better than that. Know that sometimes bad things happen to good people but that does not mean it is the end of the world.

Henry Wadsworth Longfellow once said, "Into each life some rain must fall." I want you to know that all the "what could have beens" in your life have happened for a reason. You find that when you encounter challenges along the way, you grow stronger, become more resilient  and more capable to do more and be more. Embrace your journey with love and fill your heart with joy. No one else can make you live otherwise. You are the owner of your emotions, the master of your life, and the creator of your destiny. Stop worrying about the "what could have beens" and start focusing on the blessings you have right in front of you right now and where you are going in life. The sky is the limit!

Joan Marie Ambrose -- Author, Creative Writer, Motivational Speaker

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